coriander in pho

Earlier today, I was reading this post by my colleague: “Well, that was weird”.

The post talked about the recent passing of Queen Elizabeth II, and how things feel so… weird.

I’m an Indonesian, and if my memory from my History class still correct, England (East India Company) didn’t occupy Indonesia that long, compared to the Dutch’s Vereenigde Oostindische Compagnie (Dutch East India Company) that settled in the country for a freaking 3.5 centuries or so. Indonesia fought for the independence and never been a part of any commonwealth with any European-based country.

So when the news about the passing broke, I thought I can just shrug it off and get on with my life as usual.

But dude, the… feelings. That kind of surreal feelings you have as you see the news articles, tweets, Tiktok videos… I remember I saw Charles and Camilla’s picture on my Facebook timeline with a caption: “King and Queen”, and I found myself muttered, “… … … what?”

I don’t have anything against Charles, but it’s just feel “not right,” you know? Something is no longer familiar, and it feels like you are missing a piece of puzzle. You are holding a puzzle piece and you know the piece will fits, but it’s not the same puzzle piece.

I don’t know if this is called as mourning. Perhaps not, but it’s definitely a different feeling far from “happy” or “sad” or “angry”. It’s that dumbfounded feeling that caught you off-guard.